the winds of change are blowing....

SW ⟫ 207.7 | CW ⟫ 178.3 | MGW ⟫ 168.2

Ozempic: ⟫ 0.5 mg

The winds of change are blowing! Stripes went to collect my Ozempic prescription only to hear the dreaded words: the pharmacy had none in stock. They suggested going back to the GP and requesting either the 0.25 or the 1 mg as they had stock of both. Nothing is ever that simple, so Stripes emailed the surgery making the request. They replied saying that we would need to speak to someone within their pharmacy team and should wait for a call. This was yesterday and admittedly, both of us were a tad sceptical as the surgery has been less than proactive on our behalf in the past.

However, this morning I did indeed receive a phone call. Harry* (fake name) asked how long I had been on Ozempic at 0.5 mg and I explained that I switched from Trulicity in January, all the while thinking surely this should all be in my notes. He asked what level of success I had experienced to date and was literally speechless when I told him that I had lost 30 kgs whilst on 0.5 on Trulicity and Ozempic. He thought I meant I had started in November/December 2022 and said wow when I explained that no, this was from November/December ‘23. He then explained that it was the lower doses that were currently an issue and asked if I would be happy to titrate up as this should have happened within four weeks of me starting. I said that was fine so he’s going to send through the script for collection and as of Friday I should be on 1 mg.

I also received notification of my diabetic annual physical for 25th June. So – bloods, weight, blood pressure, foot check – the lot, followed by a phone call once the results of the bloods have been received. I should be able to talk about any side effects I’ve been experiencing and they can officially note my weight.

On the one hand, I’m pleased because I did wonder when my Diabetic check was meant to take place. And moving up to 1 mg is something I have been thinking about a lot. It also works timing wise as I have my tattoo day tomorrow which means if I need to book a second day, I will be able to take into account any side effects I’m suffering from and know how to manage them.

But there is a part of me that is disgruntled that we need to do all of the chasing for this when surely the Dr should be monitoring what’s happening a little closer? As in, this shouldn’t be the first time that they become aware of how I have coped taking Ozempic and what loss (if any) I’ve managed. It feels like it confirms the loneliness I feel – that I am in this on my own with minimal support. We still haven’t heard anything about a surgery date and that feels a little like a sword of Damocles hanging over my head. I’ve been avoiding thinking about it because I’ve been obsessing over Gidget, the end of the University year and her moving back from Halls. But it’s still there in the back of my mind.

The process of moving Gidget back home has begun. Stripes is under strict instructions to be a supervisor and not an active participant as she is still suffering with her shoulder after her fall last week. Today, Gidget wasn’t feeling well and I had visions of the whole week falling apart with a mad dash to get her moved out of Halls by Saturday morning. This week is a full one: tattoo appointment all day tomorrow; Gidget has a planned day with Jaycey and Stripes is going to the theatre on Thursday evening; Gidget is working both Friday and Saturday night, and Stripes has a doctor’s appointment on Friday. Doesn’t leave a lot of time to get her moved out gradually and clean up at leisure.

So, as someone who can’t physically get in there and force things to happen, I became project manager – booked a man with a van to be at Halls at 5 pm, whilst Gidget and Stripes packed up her entire room today. Gidget wants to leave some stuff there so that she can sleep over for the rest of the week – I think she needs the last few nights of ‘freedom’ which is understandable. We’ve made it clear that Stripes won’t be available to help clean up after today, and that she and Jaycey will be responsible for getting the last of the stuff out of there and the room cleaned to an acceptable standard on Friday. We all acknowledge that if Gidget is working Friday night, not getting home until around 5 am, there is sod all chance of her getting up on Saturday morning to go over to Halls and clean before the midday deadline.

So, we will once again be a household of three come Friday. All change.

Jesus, I really don’t think I’m ready for this. But, the change in Ozempic dosage might mean that I have something else to focus my energy on. I have no idea if I’m going to be suffering from the initial symptoms all over again or what it will do to my system, so I guess it’s time to buckle up for the ride!

Ring of Fire!

SW ⟫ CW ⟫ GW

207.7 ⟫ 183.7 ⟫ 168.2

Ozempic ⟫ 0.5 mg

Kinda left things on a bit of a cliffhanger last time – my bad! Stripes sorted it – including a posse of pharmacy clients trying to sort out the complete and utter FUBAR that was dealing with the Pharmacy FKAU (they are still useless but in this instance, they came through and I got another four weeks of Ozempic).

However this week I have been suffering the plight of the damned. I don’t know if it was the home-made flapjack made by Grim, Easter eggs in excess or a simple virus, but since Thursday night I have been in hell.

We’re about to get into TMI – you have been warned.

Wednesday night felt like the purge of all things unholy – I cannot believe all of that came out of me, but I put it down to the usual once-weekly emptying out. Unfortunately, this continued throughout the entirety of Wednesday night all the way through to now (early hours of Saturday morning). Ring of fire doesn’t even cover it – I’m pretty sure I created and killed numerous haemorrhoids in the course of these three days. Liquid fire has been coming out of me steadily for nearly three days and I’m not ashamed to say that I was at the point of begging to be put out of my misery. My butt has been in so much pain, my stomach has felt twisted into knots and I have had the belches from hell. Painful, loud and feeling like they’re being punched out of me, I can’t even say that they were sulphur burps which Ozempic is apparently famous for because to me, they didn’t smell.

But they really freaking hurt.

I started on Imodium yesterday and having taken approximately seven doses, things seems to be settling down. Mind you, I thought the same last night and risked half a slice of toast – big mistake, HUGE as it felt like my insides were trying to themselves into pretzels and I was prepared to give absolutely anything for the pain to go away. I slept for over six hours, woke to pee, sip water and take another imodium, then slept for another six hours.

I haven’t risked food as such – I had some dioralyte to replenish fluids (that stuff tastes disgusting) and a cuppa-soup type thing that we had in the cupboard, and that seems to be staying put.

I weighed in this morning and saw 183.7 kg which would take my loss to 24kg or just under 53 lbs, so I should be over the moon. But I’m not because I know that loss isn’t real, and no doubt when I’ve rehydrated and begun eating again, the numbers will shoot back up.

I contemplated not taking my shot today – so much so, that I took it very late this evening. But in the end, I can’t really blame Ozempic for what I’ve been through. It could have been a virus that attacked me, the imodium definitely helped and I haven’t died. Not yet anyway. But I wonder, how much of this is me deciding that I deserve to suffer? Even now online, you can read people saying that taking drugs like Ozempic is the easy way out, that the drugs are just another crutch that fat people are using instead of willpower. And no matter how much I don’t believe that, the words seep into my brain and make me think ‘well if you’d just lost weight the normal way, you wouldn’t be suffering like this’.

We’re at the end of March so I’m going to ask Stripes to take photos of my face (side profile and full on) and once again, not show me the results. And away into April we go. At least I’m no longer as scared to fart as I was earlier in the week – I read far too many stories on Reddit of people shitting themselves, and with the diarrhoea wreaking havoc with my system, it was a genuine fear. Lucky so far and not taking any of it for granted. God, the things we do to lose weight.

As a side note, we never did hear back from Violet (makes me wonder if the message got through to her) and we also haven’t heard anything about the surgery date. Business as usual then – sometimes I feel like I’ve been given these drugs and then just left to my own devices. Ugh, I think I’ll stop here before the self-pity drags me down into it’s pit again.

Out of Stock - or maybe not!

SW ⟫ CW ⟫ GW

207.7 ⟫ 187 ⟫ 168.2

Ozempic ⟫ 0.5 mg (hopefully)

Well, it looks like it’s happening – Asda are out of stock of Ozempic, They suggested that we request the surgery reissue the prescription but for the 1 mg and that I adjust the dosage to 0.5 myself. Cue email to the surgery requesting just that and we received a phone call. Apparently, National Guidelines state that if the prescribed dosage is not available, we should wait until it’s been two weeks since the last injection before contacting the surgery again and they will then see what they can do.

I explained that if I did that – waited two weeks from the time of last injection – if they put me up to the 1mg dosage, the side effects would be awful and that after a break, you are meant to start titration from the beginning. Unfortunately, there was nothing they could do – they suggested trying to get an appointment to speak to a Diabetes doctor on Monday (cue hysterical laughter as we know how incredibly impossible a feat it is getting a Doctor’s appointment, let alone on a Monday). They also said that what Asda pharmacy suggested – adjusting the dosage myself – had been proven to be ineffective and that was another reason why they couldn’t do what I had requested.

I then called the main appointments line to see if there were any appointments available today (another miracle would be required but it was worth a try) and the woman I spoke to tried to be helpful but basically her hands were tied. She was apologetic and disappointed on my behalf and said it was madness that this was allowed to happen.

Digging around, we found the phone numbers for the Endocrinology department and tried to get hold of Violet. Bear in mind, up until now I’ve never actually had to call Violet – she’s always called me. Well just my luck, she’s not there today so I was put through to her colleague, Karen (I shit you not, what a poor name to have in this day and age) who took my details and said she would ask Violet to call me on Monday.

In the meantime, Stripes got in touch with the ‘pharmacy formerly known as useless’ as in the past, they have let us down with prescriptions and messed us about, which is why we went to Asda in the first place. Shock, horror – they actually have the right dosage in stock! Good news, right? Well, kinda – but then we had to call the surgery back to ask them to ‘release’ the prescription from Asda and put it through to the ‘Pharmacy FKAU’ – initially, the person we spoke to said that they pharmacy didn’t have the correct dosage, but we confirmed that we had just spoken to them and they had said that they did. Anxious waiting, but now the prescription has been sent to the Pharmacy FKAU and we should be able to pick it up in a few hours.

RELIEF. Or slight relief, because let’s be honest – how many times in the past have we thought something is sorted only to find out that somewhere along the line, things have gone FUBAR and we’re back to starting from scratch.

I haven’t been sleeping well – awake til 6 am in the morning with my brain working overtime. Last night was nightmares – I woke up to find that all of the weight I have lost had come back plus some literally overnight. None of my clothes fit, or my shoes and I couldn’t fit through any of the doors in the flat. Yeah, my brain is a fucked up place but we kinda already knew that.

I wouldn’t have got through all of these shenanigans without Stripes – I knew she was just as worried/panicked as I was, but she kept her cool and rang around and if this happens, it is almost 100% because of her.

I will still try to speak to Violet on Monday to see what we should do if this happens again, and I will also try to get in to see the Diabetics team at the surgery – the nearest appointment is on April 25th so that’s so incredibly useful (not). I can’t think of or imagine any other prescribed medication where this situation would be allowed to happen and for the professionals to be able to offer practically zero assistance. I know that we are extremely lucky with the NHS – everywhere else, people are having to pay for this medication out of pocket and it is extremely expensive and just as hard to get hold of. That’s why there’s a booming market in compounded semaglutide where pharmacies (or possibly other shady ass people) are mixing up their own version. But how do you know what you’re taking? The risks and side effects? So, yes, I’m lucky that the NHS prescribes this but this is a life-changing medication for people suffering from diabetes and being morbidly obese – how can this be allowed to happen? How is this right?

I wrote myself a bit of a game-plan in the case of us not being able to get hold of it. I have the Exante shakes in the cupboard and I could try to do that for a few weeks. I don’t like the idea of it for so many reasons, but it would hopefully mean that I don’t regain the weight straight away. When speaking to Stripes, I reminded myself that I am not losing the weight because I am taking Ozempic – Ozempic is the tool that enables me to ignore/not suffer from the hunger and food-noise, so if I just kept eating the way I have been recently, I should be able to maintain if not continue to lose. But the panic and noise in my head was just horrendous, and the thought of starting from scratch again and dealing with those side effects actually made me feel so incredibly low.

I am working on the blanket for the new Great-Nibling and I have an ARC to read, but I think I would also like to try to do some Mantra work this weekend. Head stuff seems to be looming large recently and I want to get on top of it. Especially with things like this happening and not having heard anything at all about my surgery date.