10% lost and Happy Mother's Day

10/03/24 SW ⟫ CW ⟫ GW

207.7 ⟫ 186.4 ⟫ 168.2

Ozempic ⟫ 0.5 mg

First of all, Happy Mother’s Day to those in the UK – I hope this day brings you love and happiness as well as fond memories. On to the brain-fart stuff.

Well, apparently I was so messed up, I kinda missed a milestone. I was trying to lose my first 10% of my bodyweight, which was 186.93 and I made it at the beginning of March but didn’t notice! So, yeah, I did that!

I’ve re-set the goal, so am now aiming for 168.2 which feels a long way away. The scales have bounced up and down a little since then so the pressure is off (if that makes sense) but it does bring home the fact that the numbers are steadily dropping. I did my injection very early on Friday morning, and once again did approximately half of the dose. I think it’s making a difference to the side effects – I made it through my entire tattoo session without needing the bathroom or gassing the place, so I’m considering that a win.

Friday was a day of what feels like excess which is why I want to try to look at what happened (apart from not taking my injection the day before). Book_grim was here so we had a McDonald’s breakfast together. I had a mega McMuffin meal with a pineapple stick and hot chocolate. It was very tasty but I didn’t finish the pineapple stick so that’s waiting in the fridge for me. Then I had home-made chowder and bread for dinner with a crunchy ice cream bar for dessert. I don’t think I was out of control – I didn’t hoover the McMuffin down and enjoyed the taste of it, and once I realised that I wasn’t enjoying the pineapple stick as much, I stopped eating it and put it into the fridge, Is that too much to eat? I mean, not a good idea to eat it every single day, but is that a lot? I don’t think I massively overate, especially pulling it back and having the soup and bread for dinner. I think I did okay.

Stripes made the soup and it was lovely – thick, filling, tasty, with nice chunks of fish and prawns. It wasn’t heavy at all and I didn’t feel bloated after eating it. I think I also had a few maoms, which admittedly when I had three in one go, I felt the sugar rush. So I need to temper how much of those I eat – they are too easy to eat without thinking about it and then I feel like crap. But other than that, I think I did okay. I keep saying that like I’m trying to convince myself of it and maybe I am.

Stripes let me have the first chapter of the Mantra worksheets but I’m a little bit stuck. First of all, I didn’t really have the energy to get into it, especially when I saw that one of the first things I need to do is ‘name’ my eating disorder so that I can talk about how it makes me feel, etc. Is it laughable that the first name I thought of was Charlie? I mean, how exactly does the name Charlie match something I’ve been fighting for the last three decades? It hardly sounds menacing does it?

I seem to keep waking up around 5 am and not being able to get back to sleep. Which means I’m a dozy mare during the day which is less than ideal. However, this morning I wrote a chapter of my ongoing fic that should have been finished last October as well as did a couple of banners so it wasn’t a waste of time. I need to do some reading as I have an ARC that is due for review pretty soon, but the plan is to have a peaceful, relaxed day reading, playing video games and just chilling. I have a hankering for cheesy beans on toast which apparently may be my Mother’s Day Meal (yay) and strikes me as quite a decent craving to have. Of course, I was putting stuff into the trolley for a food shop and all I could see were masses and masses of Easter eggs. That’s going to be an interesting one to get through – sugar rushes have been absolutely awful whilst on Ozempic, making me feel sick and dizzy – so I know I need to show some restraint when it comes to Easter and all the chocolate.

Hopefully the Ozempic will help me handle that – as well as doing the work with the Mantra stuff. Which I need to stop putting off and just get my head down and do it. I don’t have any appointments this week so I have decided that working on Mantra is going to be a priority, as well as finally taking some freaking photos so that I can see my progress. I really want to do it, even if I have to ask Stripes to hide them from me because I hate photographs of me so damned much!