Puree Week⟫ Day 6
I’m beginning to wonder if I should try to see a doctor for this cold. I can’t think of one day since the surgery when I haven’t had issues sneezing or breathing and had simply put it down to the time of year. But today was tough – Stripes had to help me with the nebuliser again and I ended up having to sleep because it seemed like the only way I could relax enough to breathe properly. I don’t want to be overly dramatic but I also don’t want to dismiss symptoms of something being wrong.
I have wondered if I’m eating too quickly and taking in too much air – my scrambled egg today was gone really quickly as I left it too long and hadn’t realised how hungry I was. I’ve also found that the best way to eat my smoothie is with a spoon as sipping from the blender seems to encourage too much air getting in. It’s frustrating but then I also need to remind myself that it’s barely been three weeks and I’m not going to get it all right straight away.
Today was day 6 of puree’d food which means on Monday I should be going to mashables. And I am more than a little scared. I had all bran yesterday and it was fine – chewing each small bite between thirty and forty times seemed to work, but that was basically like gruel. It was mainly liquid anyway – I’m not sure how it’s going to work with more solid food. I think I might start with mashed potato because that can be quite liquid-y. I was really looking forward to the eatlean cheese but every time we’ve added even a small amount to my scrambled eggs, I’ve had issues. Saying that, I’d still like to try to melt some into my mashed potatoes and see if it works.
I also found myself eating whilst playing a game on my phone and I need to not let that become a habit. I need to eat mindfully – slowly, chewing each bite at least twenty times, each meal should last at least twenty minutes.
Hard to feel positive when I can barely breathe but let me see if I can come up with something. I didn’t panic as much as the first time it got this bad – instead, I made sure to ask Stripes for the nebuliser sooner rather than later, accepted my limitations and allowed myself to just sleep. I think I have been struggling with how slow my recovery has been without considering the fact that I had major abdominal surgery, my body is still healing, and this is just the beginning of the journey. I’m doing okay, I’m a work in progress and I’m doing okay.
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